Baby, we have chemistry!

Becuase math lines while convincing are not fool proof. If you really want to score a date, use chemistry!

Really Awesome Cheesy Math Pick-up Lines!!!

How can I know so many hundreds of digits of pi and not the 7 digits of your phone number?

Since distance equals velocity times time, let's let velocity and time approach infinity, because I want to go all the way with you.

I am equivalent to the Empty Set when you are not with me.

I don’t like my current girlfriend. Mind if I do a you-substitution?

Hey, baby want to Squeeze my Theorem while I poly your nomial?

Hey...nice asymptote.

I don't know if you're in my range, but I'd sure like to take you back to my domain.

Your beauty cannot be spanned by a finite basis of vectors.

Honey, you're sweeter than pi.

If you were sin x and I was cos x, then together we'd make one.

Battle Scene (TRD Part 7)

I didn't want to traumatize anyone so here's a nice, soothing self-portrait:

cool places = anywhere that sells novel or unusual foods.

squeegee = 1. old, ragged, not highly valued (usually clothes/shoes) 2. those really awesome

sponge thingys

shindiggythingy = meeting, event, party, etc.

thingything = whatchamacallit

semi- (i.e. semi-arbitrary) = sometimes, for the most part

savez = from the french "savez-vous?" which means "you know?". The original ancestor of

"savvy" before those English bastards bastardized it.

inane = meaningless. not to be confused with "insane"

comments = often cryptic, usually meaningless words spouted seemingly at random. frequently

intended to provoke a specific reaction.

Margin Text: The battle scene was deemed too traumatic. Here is a picture of a cat.

TRD Part 6

I have two words for you: Epic. Battle.

weird = high praise. normal is boring.

normal = a rare, possibly fictitious breed of human with magical powers over social norms. No

sightings have been reliably documented, and all attempts at breeding one in captivity have

failed.

sailor = one who drinks, swears, and messes about in boats. particularly adept at doing all 3 at

once. see also "pirate".

boat = just remember, your bed is one.

Summon The Celt! TRD Part 5

He has a really big...well, you know.

uh oh = some shit's about to go down.

oops = don't look at it, maybe it will magically fix itself! not to be confused with "opps"

don't be hatin = see "I don't wanna hear it"

LIES! = 1. FALSEHOODS! 2. UNTRUTHS! 3. FALLACIES! 4. PURPOSEFUL

MISCONCEPTIONS!

neither here nor there = 1. important but irrelevant 2. experiencing a time-space paradox

snarfed = ate quickly and without finesse

with avec much skill and finesse = the only way to accomplish anything. exacto knives are

optional.

loser = an affectionate nickname

Margin Text: I may be wearing a skirt, but I have a really BIG AXE.

Ninja Dude Returns (TRD Part 4)

Who is that mysterious dude climbing up the side of the page?

shadowflash = Rachel's personal insignia. Also her most common online alias.

random = 1. apparently illogical 2. ulterior motives 3. refrigerator says what?

question mark? = I am confused. Please elaborate.

nomnomnom = 1. sound made when in the process of eating 2. the mating cry of Rachel

lad/lass = archaism which Rachel tends to slip into when stressed. sometimes accompanied by a

faint celtic accent.

Piracy At The End Of The World (TRD Part 3)

You know the drill.

pirate = 1. YARR!!! 2. the Hubbard clan 3. an excuse to be loud, obnoxious, crude, daring, get in

people's faces, drink a lot, and sing at the top of your lungs at 2 AM on your way back

from the ghetto. also see "sailor"

I love (object or idea) = I like it a lot and think about it frequently.

I love you = no translation available

mmm = noncommittal sound of acknowledgment. I heard you, but I'm probably not going to do

anything about it.

grrr = now would be a good time for you to leave.

(low rumbling noise) = either frustration or contentment, depending on context.

clan = conglomeration of friends, acquaintances, and extended family, usually based around a

biological/unbiological family.

Margin Text: salmon.

The Rachel Dictionary, Part 2

Since I have crappy handwriting, the text is replicated below the image.

legit = imate

gank, ganked, ganking, ganker = steal, stole, stealing, thief. not to be confused with "shank".

I don't wanna talk about it = seriously, drop it already

please stop = I'm *this* close to violently freaking out so please, please, PLEASE stop what you're doing.

I don't wanna hear it = 1. yeah, yeah, whatever 2. details, details

details = 1. removed tails 2. those little annoying things I hate 3. (sarcasm)

Margin Text: Interrupting Cow is interrupting your reading.

An Epic Is Born...Or Two.

So I was really, really bored at work the other day (hey, it's not my fault I'm super efficient) and I decided to begin the Rachel Dictionary in order to enlighten people who are frequently confused by my phraseology. I doodled in the margins while I tried to remember all those important Rachelisms, and thus was Ninja Dude born. Therefore, without further ado, I give you:

The Rachel Dictionary:

Long Words, Short Words, and Non-words.

HUNGRY! = my stomach's talking to my backbone, where the f*** is my food?

hungryhungryhungry = I am now focused entirely on the prospect of food. If you want me to pay attention, feed me.

hungry, I am = I am going to eat your food. This is your last chance to hide the crack brownies/chex mix.

I don't eschew obfuscation = I like big words.

floccinaucinihilipilification = the estimation of something as valueless.

ness = stuff

arbitrary = 1. random 2. aesthetic 3. insignificant

ninja = n. the Hubbard clan v. 1. to sneak 2. to

Challenge...

Here's another challenge inspired by Sarah's!

It's from "Sideways Arithmetic from Wayside School", one of my favorite books when I was a kid!

(Yes, I used to be a math nerd before turning to the art side)

elf

+ elf

______

fool

Each letter stands for a digit. So, what do e, l, f, and o stand for?

Challenge...

If...
2 + 3 = 10
7 + 2 = 63
6 + 5 = 66
8 + 4 = 96

what does 9 + 7 = ????


a math challenge given to me via email. the answer was the code to open an excel file with names of everyone who solved it. decently impressive. i needed a break from homework, this is what i do....

A Delayed Saint Patty's Day Post

bottle of vodka...........$15
24 pack of Nati...........$20
green food coloring... $3
mixers.........................$20
solo cups......................$6
late night pizza...........$11

Being the only sober one in calculus at 11 on St. Patrick's Day: PRICELESS

The meaning of EPIC

What exactly is EPIC?

EPIC is:

Excellence

Professionalism

Innovation

Creativity

In other words, the house of EPIC is just that: epic.